The Notorious Al-gebra Movement March 1, 2007Posted by gordonwatts in life.
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NEW YORK, NY – A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a
At a morning press conference, Senator Teddy Kennedy said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, but asked that he be charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math
instruction. “Al-gebra is a problem for us,” Kennedy said. “They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like ‘X’ and ‘Y’ and refer to themselves as ‘ unknowns’, but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, ‘There are three sides to every triangle’.”
When asked to comment on the arrest, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes.”